She just used a chaser for red wine.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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