She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
