Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
My vagina is very pro this idea
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
