i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
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When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.