Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
