Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
