Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
