Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
