dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize