I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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