we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
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It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
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You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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