I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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