He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
