Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
