Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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