Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
