I hate your face
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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