I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
