I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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