i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
