i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
