Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
