So drunk, too bad you don't want this
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
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