some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Randomize
