They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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