She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
