I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
