Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
