i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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