Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Randomize
