You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Reggie can tackle my bush.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
