Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I stole a fireplace last night.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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