He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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