Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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