Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
