carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
There was a lot of him and a little penis
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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