The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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