i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
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I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize