I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize