I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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