My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Randomize
