I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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