New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
3 2 1 whiskey
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
