Joe is yelling at the trees again.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
foreskin is a definite game changer
This is classic penis vs brain.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
