you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
