Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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