I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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