i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Randomize
