Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
