I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
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I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things ππ
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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